IELTS Academic Writing Task 1: Pie Chart Distribution — Model Answer
In the examiner’s room, we don't look for "flowery" language. We look for data integrity and logical grouping. A Band 9 response on pie charts isn't about listing every percentage; it’s about synthesizing the proportions into a coherent narrative of dominance and decline.
The question
The pie charts below show the primary reasons for land degradation globally, and the table identifies how these causes affected three specific regions in the 1990s.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
(Note: For this reference, we will focus on the Pie Chart element—Global Causes: Deforestation (30%), Over-grazing (35%), Over-cultivation (28%), and Other (7%).)
Model answer (opening excerpt)
The two pie charts provide a breakdown of the four primary catalysts for global land degradation and compare their relative impact across three geographical territories during the 1990s.
The full Band 9 response, with paragraph-by-paragraph examiner notes, is part of Ted.Talks.DZ coaching.
The Trap → The Logic → The Fix
| The Trap | The Logic | The Fix |
|---|---|---|
| The "Listing" Habit: Writing "Deforestation was 30%. Over-grazing was 35%. Over-cultivation was 28%." | Examiners view this as "mechanical" reporting. It falls under Band 6 because it lacks "overview" and "data selection." | Synthesize and Group: Use phrases like "The trio of primary causes accounted for over nine-tenths of the total..." |
| Using Subjective Language: "The shocking amount of deforestation..." or "The sad reality that..." | Task 1 is an objective report. Subjective adjectives lower your Lexical Resource score as they are inappropriate for the genre. | Maintain Neutrality: Use "significant," "substantial," "marginal," or "negligible." |
| Over-complicating Intro: Spending 5 minutes writing a complex introduction. | The intro is only worth about 10% of your mental energy. The marks are in the Body and Overview. | Paraphrase Quickly: Change "reasons" to "catalysts," "show" to "illustrate," and "regions" to "geographical territories." |
Band-by-Band Breakdown
| Element | Why This is Band 9 | Common Band 6 Version |
|---|---|---|
| Data Integration | Integrates data into sentences: "...at 35%, followed closely by..." | Lists data separately: "Over-grazing was 35%. The next was deforestation at 30%." |
| Lexical Precision | Uses "plurality," "catalysts," "marginal," and "collectively." | Uses "reasons," "small," "big," and "together." |
| Grammatical Range | Uses complex structures: "leaving only a marginal 7% to be attributed to..." | Uses simple sentences: "The other causes were only 7%." |
| Comparison | Compares categories internally (93% vs 7%) and externally (Europe vs Oceania). | Mentions numbers without comparing them to each other. |
More: all model answers · Task 2 structure guide
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