IELTS Writing Task 2 Discussion Essay: Crime Prevention — Model Answer
IELTS Writing Task 2 Discussion Essay: Crime Prevention — Model Answer. Question, examiner-style analysis and common traps.
The question
Some people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways to reduce crime.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.
The Trap → The Logic → The Fix
The Trap: Many candidates spend the entire essay talking about why people commit crime (poverty, drugs) without ever mentioning prison sentences. This is a "Task Response" failure because it ignores the prompt's specific comparison.
The Logic: The examiner is looking for a direct comparison between the effectiveness of sentences versus the effectiveness of alternatives. You must evaluate the "prison" side, even if you disagree with it.
The Fix: Use the "While/Although" concession structure in your topic sentences.
- Example: "While the retributive nature of long-term imprisonment satisfies the public's need for justice, it often fails as a long-term preventative measure."
- This single sentence addresses both sides of the prompt simultaneously, signaling to the marker that you are operating at a Band 8+ level of cognitive complexity.
Band-by-Band Breakdown: The Crime Prevention Context
| Element | Why This is Band 9 | Common Band 6 Version |
|---|---|---|
| Task Response | Addresses the "best way" nuance. Argues that "best" is subjective and depends on the goal (punishment vs. prevention). | Simply says "I think prison is good but also education is good." |
| Coherence | Uses "referencing" (e.g., "this principle," "such measures") to link ideas without using "Firstly/Secondly." | Relies heavily on mechanical linkers: "First of all," "Secondly," "In addition." |
| Lexical Resource | Uses precise collocations: recidivism rates, custodial longevity, socio-economic precursors, general deterrence. | Uses repetitive or vague language: going to jail, doing bad things, people who do crime, long time in prison. |
| Grammar | High frequency of conditional and relative clauses (e.g., "A society that relies solely on..."). | Mostly simple and compound sentences with occasional "if" sentences. |
More: all model answers · Task 2 structure guide
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